


rose tinted glasses (cracks in the armor)

by starksnack



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Inspired by Twitter, M/M, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), civil war angst, i can't believe i'm writing a cacw fic in 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:27:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23452438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starksnack/pseuds/starksnack
Summary: Things have been better than what Steve could’ve hoped for when he came back from Wakanda. Almost as if nothing had changed. While a part of him wants to know why, the rest of him is perfectly happy to not overthink it too much. As you might expect, that comes back to bite him later.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 25
Kudos: 163





	rose tinted glasses (cracks in the armor)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [cptstarkrogers](https://archiveofourown.org/users/cptstarkrogers/gifts).



> Alternatively titled "Elizabeth Demands a Sequel"
> 
> Summary by QueenE because I'm useless.
> 
> Based off [this](https://twitter.com/wingheadx/status/1230538447733043200?s=20) tweet by @wingheadx. thank you rebekah for hypothetically encouraging me to write this.
> 
> Special thanks to my beloved, [QueenE](https://starksnack.tumblr.com/) for the beta. I would die without her honestly, like, she owns my whole soul.

The last thing Steve had expected after returning home from Wakanda was being welcomed back with open arms.

Tony had gone through great lengths with his team of lawyers to pester the Accords council into amending the agreement in a way that didn’t shit on the Constitution. Steve and the rest of the “Rogues” (Steve thought it was a silly name considering the number of times that they had saved the world, but the American public was always fickle with their heroes) had to sign the paperwork and they were allowed back onto US soil.

It was a lot of bureaucracy that honestly didn’t matter. What mattered was that he was back in the compound where he belonged and that things were going well with Tony.

They had been together before all of this and Steve was glad to be able to pick things back up from where they left off. He had figured there would be bad blood considering Siberia and everything that had happened, but Tony didn’t mention it, just smiled softly before kissing him gently and welcoming him home.

It was far from what Steve deserved, but he was grateful anyway.

Footsteps sound from behind the couch where Steve is sitting, soft and muted against the carpet which can only mean one person. Grinning, Steve looks up to see Tony entering the living room, loosening the tie around his neck and shooting Steve a warm smile in return. It doesn’t quite reach his eyes, but Steve figures he’s just had a long day of meetings and not enough time in the lab.

“How was work?” Steve asks, setting his sketchbook down on the coffee table and turning to give Tony his full attention. He is dressed in a three-piece suit which meant a board meeting, and that can’t have been fun. He had long since lost his shoes, probably kicked off in the hallway because they pinched at his toes. His socks are bright purple with little Hulks on them and Steve has to resist the urge to gather him into a warm hug.

Tony shrugs as he pours himself a steaming cup of coffee. “The usual. Incompetent people trying to tell Pepper how she should run her company.”

“Do you want to tell me about it over a massage?” Steve offers with a cheeky grin. “I’ve been told I’m good with my hands.”

Quirking an eyebrow, Tony chuckles at him before setting his mug down on the counter and nodding, “that sounds like a good plan.”

Turning on his heel, Tony heads toward the bedroom. Not what Steve had been expecting, but he definitely likes where this is going. He follows after Tony excitedly, his lip caught between his teeth as his eyes trail down to the curve of the other man’s ass.

Since he’d gotten back they hadn’t had a chance to do more than heavy making out in the workshop and blowjobs exchanged in a bathroom. Steve couldn’t wait to finally get his hands on Tony’s perfect ass, to kiss across his chest and cup his cheeks and watch his face as he came apart and allowed Steve to put him back together again.

Tony doesn’t even give Steve the chance to get his hands on his shoulders to work out the tense knots before pressing their lips together in a sloppy kiss. It’s not something Steve was prepared for and he is momentarily caught off guard, but he rolls with it, his hands sliding around the other man’s waist and hoisting him up into his arms. Tony moans in response, the sound muffled against Steve’s beard as his fingers tangle in the hair at the nape of Steve’s neck, tugging gently.

“I got you,” Steve whispers, laying Tony down in the silk sheets and pressing kisses to his neck. Sucking at the pale skin, Steve tries his best to leave a mark so Tony will remember this later, remember him.

The moment he pops the button on Tony’s collar, they’re rolling so he is on top, his fingers pulling Steve’s shirt over his head and popping the button on his jeans. Quickly shrugging off his jacket as an afterthought, Tony leans forward to mouth at Steve’s neck, pulling at his nipples until they’re red as he runs his fingers up and down the warm expanse of Steve’s skin.

Tony kicks off his slacks and boxers in a practiced motion before tugging at Steve’s jeans and looking up at him with an exasperated huff as though he expects Steve to be naked as soon as possible. Steve laughs, lifting his hips to shed his own pants and boxers until he’s fully naked under Tony.

“Is there still lube in the drawer?” Tony asks and Steve frowns. Sure, Tony had been too busy in the workshop to join him in bed these last few days, but surely he’s slept in here since Steve left a couple of months ago. It was, after all, their shared room and had been since the compound was finished with construction.

Setting aside that thought for a later date, Steve reaches over to pull the drawer open, grabbing the bottle of lube and drizzling it onto his fingers.

Tony slumps against his chest, the silk fabric of his shirt soft against Steve’s sore nipples. Reaching down, he teases at Tony’s entrance, circling the rim a couple of times as he feels Tony relax. He’s so beautiful like this, pliant and open as Steve presses against the most intimate part of him.

Squeezing out more lube into his hand, Steve feels Tony shiver as the cold gel spreads across his hole before Steve is pressing a finger inside, marvelling at how tight Tony is. Six months apart could do that, but Steve is surprised that with his reputation Tony hadn’t just gone out and found someone else to keep him company.

“Feels so good,” Tony mumbles into his neck, eyelashes fluttering against Steve’s jaw as he keens against him. Precome drips onto Steve’s belly as Tony seeks friction against his abs.

Sliding into Tony feels like coming home and Steve groans at how tight the smaller man is around him. He tightens his hands around Tony’s waist, pressing their hips together with a soft sigh. This is where he is always meant to be.

Tipping Tony’s chin up, Steve kisses him softly, tongue swiping against his bottom lip to taste his coconut chapstick. He smells like coffee and Steve drinks him in, tired and lovely. 

Tony pushes himself up and grinds his hips down further onto Steve with a satisfied sigh. His silk shirt frames his hard cock perfectly and Steve finds himself unable to resist reaching down and stroking him just to hear the pretty moans falling from his kiss-bitten lips.

“Please, Steve.”

The words are his undoing and he slides his feet under him for traction, keeping a firm grip on Tony’s hips. His thumb slots perfectly against Tony’s skin, a reminder that they were made for each other as Steve fucks up into him in short thrusts.

It’s not his favorite position, Steve would much rather have Tony needy and begging under him as he fucks him into the mattress, but he’s too immersed in Tony’s soft grunts to care all that much about flipping their position. 

It’s over fairly quickly. Neither of them have really spent the last six months building up endurance, but it’s still perfect for Steve who gets to hold such an incredible man in his arms and kiss him like he had never left.

Tony slumps against his chest as Steve runs his fingers up and down his back, pressing kisses to every inch of skin he can reach. Tony sighs against his pecs before suddenly tensing, setting Steve’s nerves on edge.

“Oh fuck, I have a project going in the shop.”

Before Steve can respond, Tony is out of bed, pulling his pants and boxers up in one smooth motion and practically sprinting out the door. The lock clicks shut quietly behind him, leaving Steve feeling absolutely drained. As much as he likes what they had done earlier, he had also been looking forward to cuddling, and as far as he knew it was Tony’s favorite part of their relationship too.

Steve loves pillow talk. There’s nothing more appealing than Tony, pliant and warm under his fingertips as he draws shapes against the man’s back, pressing kisses to his fingertips and whispering sweet nothings in his ear. Tony blissed out and calm is Steve’s favorite version of him, especially when he lights up when Steve tells him he loves him.

It continues like that for the next couple of weeks. They have sex every other day or so, but Tony doesn’t take his shirt off. He’s always distracting Steve when his hands find themselves at the hem of Tony’s sweater or the collar of his tops. It’s driving Steve crazy and he can’t figure out why.

Not only that, but Tony doesn’t stick around after the sex either, always disappearing back to the workshop or citing a call he has to make or suddenly craving some food. Steve doesn’t begrudge him for the flimsy excuses but each one makes his heart hurt a little more.

They feel more like friends with benefits than the partners they’ve been these last five years and Steve can’t help but feel like Tony is pulling away, despite how physically close they are. They don’t even sleep in the same bed anymore. All of Tony’s stuff is still in Steve’s room, framed pictures of him and Rhodey from college, a second toothbrush in the cup by the sink, fanmail pinned to the corkboard hanging above their dresser. Everything is there but Tony and it kills Steve inside to think that the man is spending his nights on the lonely cot in the workshop rather than in a warm bed beside Steve.

To make matters worse, the bags that are permanently etched under Tony’s eyes are a sign that he’s been having nightmares again. He hadn’t had any since they got together, and the fact that they’re back worries Steve a lot more than it should. Not to mention that instead of seeking refuge in Steve’s arms like he normally does, he’s been absent and distant whenever Steve asks about it.

It’s been three weeks since he got back and he’s no closer to figuring out anything about what’s been going on with Tony.

“Hey, FRIDAY?” Steve asks tentatively.

There’s a long, hesitant pause before the AI responds. “Yes, Captain Rogers?”

Steve doesn’t even know what to say. He’s ashamed to admit that he can’t even talk to his partner of five years and get a straight answer. He hates feeling like a stranger in his own relationship, and yet, it’s like Tony is someone he’s never met before.

“Do you know where Tony is?”

“I’m afraid I cannot disclose that information,” FRIDAY responds, her voice cold. Steve shivers, his heart stopping in his chest. She was upset with him, which meant Tony was probably upset with him as well. Apparently, things were a lot more broken than Steve had originally thought.

“Is Tony in the compound right now?” Steve asks, already standing and getting ready to search the whole place top to bottom until he finds the other man.

There’s another long silence before Friday answers. “He is.”

Steve spends the next couple of hours running through the compound looking for Tony. He’s not in the workshop, the gym, the atrium, or the library. Steve rules out their room because now that he thinks about it, Tony is only ever there long enough for them to have sex. The kitchen is also empty, as is the garage, and the office. After spending hours looking for him and asking FRIDAY multiple times for assistance, Steve doesn’t find him. Tony has always been good at hiding. He just hasn’t hidden from Steve in a long time.

Despite his best efforts, it’s another week of hell before Steve sees Tony again. He tries to occupy his time with the other Avengers, eating lunch with Natasha and trying to get to know Vision better because the part of him that is JARVIS practically raised Tony. He facetimes Clint, replies to Scott’s fanmail, and hopes that he’s not disappointing Peggy yet again.

Rhodes is at the compound for a couple of training sessions and Steve thinks about talking to him, but the look he receives when he takes a step toward the other man is a quick indicator that a conversation is not welcome anytime soon. Steve realizes that’s understandable, seeing as he did break a lot of things while looking for Bucky, even if Tony was also partially to blame. Not to mention that the fight in Berlin left Rhodes paralyzed from the waist down.

On a sunny Friday afternoon, he’s on the Wakandan equivalent of Skype with Princess Shuri, talking to her about Bucky’s recovery. Apparently she’s been making a lot of headway with deprogramming the code words in his brain. She estimates the recovery to take a little over a month before Barnes should be back home with Steve.

“How are things going over there?” Shuri asks, her hands flying across her keyboard a million miles a minute even as she’s talking to Steve. It’s amazing how well she can multitask, an indicator of how incredible of a genius she is.

Steve shrugs, looking around him as though the room can answer for him. “Things have been going good. I’ve been drawing a lot, hanging out with Tony.” If seeing him a week ago to fuck him into his mattress constituted as hanging out.

Shuri’s face immediately lights up, her fingers freezing over the keyboard. “Oh! When you see Tony, please thank him for the equipment he sent over, I think BARF has been so helpful in Barnes’ recovery.”

“BARF?” Steve asks, his brows furrowed in confusion. He wasn’t quite sure how vomit was supposed to help his best friend’s memory, but then again, he wasn’t a genius so maybe he was just out of the loop.

“Binary Augmented Retro-Framing,” Shuri explains, a picture appearing on Steve’s screen of the glasses and an article of a presentation Tony did at MIT just before everything with the Accords went down. “Basically it helps recode memories.”

Steve nodded absentmindedly, his eyes flickering over the article. There was a photo of Tony at the bottom, not from the speech but from a couple of weeks prior, of Tony and Rhodes exiting Stark Industries. He was smiling in the photo, and at that moment, Steve realises that all of the smiles he had gotten since he had returned to the compound had been mere fragments of the real thing.

Things were apparently even worse than Steve originally thought.

“-you okay?” Shuri is saying as Steve tunes back in. He smiles at the teen and nods.

“I’m okay.” He swallows around the lump in his throat, trying to control his breathing, but it feels like the rug’s been pulled out from underneath him and all that’s left below is empty space. Steve’s stomach is free falling and he can’t seem to grasp onto anything. “I have to run, but I’ll talk to you next week.”

“See you then Captain,” Shuri replies as she waves, the video call clicking off.

Steve leans back in his chair, eyes closed as he wonders what his life has come to. Everything that he thought had been going well with Tony had all been Steve hoping for something he may never get back. He’d been reading so far into every interaction and now he wasn’t sure what was real and what wasn’t.

Standing and stretching, Steve seeks out Tony again, searching through the rooms in the compounds. It’s a last-ditch effort to find the other man and talk to him, and Steve so desperately wants confirmation that everything between them is okay. Wants Tony’s full smile as he kisses Steve and tells him that he loves him.

A quiet humming from behind a closed door has Steve turning his head. From years spent accompanying Tony in the workshop, he recognises the tune of “Back in Black” and his heart stops in his chest. Finally, after weeks of trying to catch him, he’s going to get to see Tony. Steve’s heart picks up its pace in his chest and he steels himself before entering.

Silently pushing the door open, Steve takes a quiet step in, hoping he won’t spook Tony. The smaller man is standing against the far wall, his back to Steve as he faces his wardrobe. In the mirror of the closet door Steve can see Tony’s reflection, confused at the weird tattoo across his chest. Squinting, Steve pushes closer, it looks as though Tony has marker scribbles streaked across his tan skin.

Suddenly it hits him. Steve chokes on thin air and Tony startles, whirling around with his hand cupped protectively over the space where the arc reactor used to be. It’s a defensive motion born out of habit and Steve hates that he’s invaded Tony’s home and made him feel unsafe where he is supposed to feel safest.

“What are you doing here?” Tony asks his eyes wide and terrified as he tries to close his shirt and cover up what Steve has already seen.

The scar runs across the length of Tony’s chest diagonally, painfully raised keloids and a mess of damaged tissue. It had probably ruined the skin graft where the arc reactor had been. The tiny scars around the major one indicated that Tony’s artificial sternum had probably shattered with the impact and had to be replaced. Steve had totally forgotten about that and the image in front of him is a terribly painful reminder.

“I’m so sorry,” Steve chokes out.

Tony sighs, tired and defeated as he lets go of the front of his shirt. He doesn’t meet Steve’s eyes.

“Me too.”

**Author's Note:**

> If enough people want a second chapter, I'll write one but honestly, I think this might be how it ends. 
> 
> Come chat with me on [tumblr](https://starksnack.tumblr.com/) and [twitter](https://www.twitter.com/starksnack/).


End file.
